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	<title>I Am The Blog &#187; Humor</title>
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	<description>Atheist blog and news</description>
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		<title>God Is Not Great (and other songs)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/06/22/god-is-not-great-and-other-songs/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/06/22/god-is-not-great-and-other-songs/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Jun 2010 17:20:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[American Freethought]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CD Baby]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dogma Free America]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Geologic Podcast]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[George Hrab]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God is Not Great]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Skepticality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Trebuchet]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1335</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you haven&#8217;t yet, be sure to check out George Hrab&#8216;s new album Trebuchet, as previewed for free on his own Geologic Podcast as well as several others (Dogma Free America, American Freethought, Skepticality, etc.). There are a number of skeptic/freethought tunes on it, insightful lyrics, and a great variety of musical styles. Just bought [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="id_4c20f3201988c42b2ab49"><img class="aligncenter" title="George Hrab Trebuchet cover" src="http://asset-server2.libsyn.com/item/k-4d2eaa5e305a0341/assets/Hrab_Trebuchet_cover-400.jpg" alt="" width="326" height="326" /></div>
<p>If you haven&#8217;t yet, be sure to check out <a title="George Hrab's Geologica Podcast" href="http://www.geologicpodcast.com/">George Hrab</a>&#8216;s new album <em> Trebuchet</em>, as previewed for free on his own <a title="George Hrab's Geologica Podcast" href="http://www.geologicpodcast.com/">Geologic Podcast</a> as well as several  others (<a title="Dogma Free America" href="http://dogmafreeamerica.com/index.php?post_id=573262">Dogma Free  America</a>, <a title="American Freethought" href="http://www.americanfreethought.com/wordpress/2009/07/16/podcast-59a-bill-maher-stand-up-tour/">American Freethought</a>,  <a title="Skepitcality" href="http://www.skepticality.com/">Skepticality</a>, etc.).  There are a number of skeptic/freethought tunes on it, insightful  lyrics, and a great variety of musical styles. Just bought my own copy and am loving it. Check it out at:</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="George Hrab's Geologica Podcast" onmousedown="UntrustedLink.bootstrap($(this),  &quot;92db3xBpTnPd-X65KsXExyQ5vGw&quot;, event);" rel="nofollow" href="http://www.geologicpodcast.com/the_geologic_podcast_episode_170" target="_blank">http://www.geologicpodcast.com/the_geologic_podcast_episode_170</a><br />
<a title="CD Baby" onmousedown="UntrustedLink.bootstrap($(this),  &quot;92db337mLvkY2kLEMvYMX2k2USA&quot;, event);" rel="nofollow" href="https://www.cdbaby.com/cd/hrab6" target="_blank">https://www.cdbaby.com/cd/hrab6</a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">
<p style="text-align: left;"><em>Image source: <a title="George Hrab's Geologica Podcast" rel="nofollow" href="http://www.geologicpodcast.com/the_geologic_podcast_episode_170" target="_blank">http://www.geologicpodcast.com/the_geologic_podcast_episode_170</a></em></p>
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		<title>Big Butter Jesus burns to the ground</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/06/16/big-butter-jesus-burns-to-the-ground/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/06/16/big-butter-jesus-burns-to-the-ground/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 Jun 2010 13:57:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ablaze]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big Butter Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Daytona Daily News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Heywood Banks]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[King of Kings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new lyrics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Touchdown Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Yahoo News]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1324</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Big Butter Jesus, aka Touchdown Jesus, a giant Jesus monument in southern Ohio made famous in part by comedian-songwriter Heywood Banks, just burned to the ground after being hit by lightning Monday night. Some were saddened by the fire, while others were amused that God would send a lightning bolt to consume a monument to [...]]]></description>
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<p style="text-align: left;">Big Butter Jesus, aka Touchdown Jesus, a giant Jesus monument in southern Ohio made famous in part by comedian-songwriter <a title="Heywood Banks" href="http://heywoodbanks.com/">Heywood Banks</a>, just burned to the ground after being hit by lightning Monday night. Some  were saddened by the fire, while others were amused that God would send a lightning bolt to consume a monument to his Son in fire. (God did allegedly send the real thing down to die a torturous death and burn in hell for 3 days, so I think setting the Jesus statue ablaze is nothing in comparison.)</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">This is big news; it made the mainstream newswires, which is how I found  out about it. Fortunately no one was hurt, but it sounds like tons of  people stopped by on the highway to see the giant fireball burn.</p>
<p><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/capt.d1d33865e14d42b8b5fb0de9a60b4d93-b8bd107213aa4e03a8cbb7d90584d889-0.jpg"></a><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/capt.cded2dff11fa4a96a1cbe9cf0c51d664-4d3393dbfb36415fbb259184b3a8d6e2-0.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1330" title="Lightning Strikes Jesus Statue" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/capt.cded2dff11fa4a96a1cbe9cf0c51d664-4d3393dbfb36415fbb259184b3a8d6e2-0-300x214.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="214" /></a><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1325" title="Lightning Strikes Jesus Statue" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/capt.d1d33865e14d42b8b5fb0de9a60b4d93-b8bd107213aa4e03a8cbb7d90584d889-0-300x207.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="207" /></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">To look at the thing, in photos at least, you just kind of assumed if it wasn&#8217;t made out of butter, it had to be made out of something solid. Certainly somebody must have realized that making a huge flammable statue with a metal frame was not a good idea. I guess not. <a title="Yahoo News" href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_lightning_strikes_jesus_statue">According to Yahoo News/AP</a>, &#8220;it was made of plastic foam and fiberglass over a steel frame.&#8221; The steel frame is all that is left now of the $300,000 statue officially called &#8220;King of Kings&#8221;. But never fear: the church says &#8220;&#8221;It will be back, but this time we are going to try for something fireproof.&#8221; (that&#8217;s an actual quote, by the way, from co-pastor Darlene Bishop.)</p>
<p>I found out about the monument thanks to a  friend who showed me Heywood&#8217;s song a few years back. I thought it was  hilarious. My wife, who&#8217;s a Christian as I&#8217;ve mentioned before, thought the song was hilarious, too. The song is often in my head when reading about various Christian wackiness. Here&#8217;s a <a title="Big Butter Jesus lyrics" href="http://www.allthelyrics.com/song/899893/">link to the lyrics</a>; it&#8217;s funnier if you just listen to it before reading the lyrics, in my opinion.</p>
<p>Heywood Banks was asked about the fire, and according to <a title="Daytona Daily" href="http://www.daytondailynews.com/news/dayton-news/comedian-updates-song-after-demise-of-big-butter-jesus-763582.html?cxtype=rss_local-news">Daytona Daily News</a> he said he has concocted <a title="Daytona Daily" href="http://www.daytondailynews.com/news/dayton-news/comedian-updates-song-after-demise-of-big-butter-jesus-763582.html?cxtype=rss_local-news">new lyrics</a> to the song in light of it burning down (&#8220;extra crispy Jesus!&#8221;). No YouTube or audio of this version seems available yet, but when it comes out I&#8217;ll be sure to post it here.</p>
<h6>Image sources: http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Lightning-strikes-Jesus-statue-Ohio/ss/events/us/061510lightningjesus#photoViewer=/100615/480/urn_publicid_ap_org4d3393dbfb36415fbb259184b3a8d6e2 ; http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Dayton-Daily-News-lightning-King-of-King-thunderstorm/photo//100615/480/urn_publicid_ap_org_b8bd107213aa4e03a8cbb7d90584d889//s:/ap/us_lightning_strikes_jesus_statue;_ylt=Anli0fY6DBOdEojribnAFmJH2ocA;_ylu=X3oDMTE5bGZwZGlsBHBvcwMxBHNlYwN5bl9yX3RvcF9waG90bwRzbGsDZmxhbWVzc2hvb3R1</h6>
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		<title>Teach the controversy: Armageddon vs. Global Warming</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/25/teach-the-controversy-armageddon-vs-global-warming/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/25/teach-the-controversy-armageddon-vs-global-warming/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 25 May 2010 14:31:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Chuch and State]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Armageddon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Global Warming]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Onion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[video]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1310</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Some more religious hilarity from the Onion. Thanks to Richard from Facebook for finding this one. Christian Groups: Biblical Armageddon Must Be Taught Alongside Global Warming]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: left;">Some more religious hilarity from <a title="The Onion" href="http://theonion.com">the Onion</a>. Thanks to <a title="Facebook" href="http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1081846019">Richard</a> from Facebook for finding this one.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="480" height="430" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /><param name="src" value="http://media.theonion.com/flash/video/onn_player.swf?videoid=17491&amp;embedded=true&amp;host=http://www.theonion.com" /><param name="flashvars" value="videoid=17491&amp;embedded=true&amp;host=http://www.theonion.com" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="480" height="430" src="http://media.theonion.com/flash/video/onn_player.swf?videoid=17491&amp;embedded=true&amp;host=http://www.theonion.com" flashvars="videoid=17491&amp;embedded=true&amp;host=http://www.theonion.com" wmode="transparent" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object><br />
<a href="http://www.theonion.com/video/christian-groups-biblical-armageddon-must-be-taugh,17491/"></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.theonion.com/video/christian-groups-biblical-armageddon-must-be-taugh,17491/">Christian Groups: Biblical Armageddon Must Be Taught Alongside Global Warming</a></p>
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		<title>Where&#8217;s Jesus&#8217; birth certificate?! (Photo)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/24/jesus-birth-certificate/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/24/jesus-birth-certificate/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 24 May 2010 18:19:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Commentary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[arkansas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[birth certificate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[birther]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cross]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SAB]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Skeptic's annotated bible]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1291</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[While my wife and I were traveling through Arkansas this weekend, I decide we just had to pull over to take a picture. It was a picture of a cross next to a "birther" sign...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>While my wife and I were traveling through Arkansas this weekend, I decided we just had to pull over to take a picture.</p>
<p><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/JesusBirthCertificate.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1290" title="JesusBirthCertificate" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/JesusBirthCertificate-225x300.jpg" alt="" width="225" height="300" /></a></p>
<p>I couldn&#8217;t help but laugh at this. I&#8217;m assuming there were two separate intended messages here:</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">• I haven&#8217;t seen enough proof that Barack Obama was really born in America, and therefore he shouldn&#8217;t be President.<br />
• Jesus Christ is my savior, since he definitely died on the cross and rose again for our sins.</p>
<p>My reading of this scene, however, is</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">• People may say that Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins, but<br />
• We don&#8217;t even have solid historical evidence of his birth, death, or resurrection, so how do we know he even existed?</p>
<p>My wife, who is a Christian, also understood right away why putting these two symbols together was pretty funny, since the result is almost certainly not what was intended in rural, highly Christian Arkansas.</p>
<p>By posting this photo, I am not necessarily claiming myself that Jesus never existed (although many before me have made such claims, understandly given the Bible can&#8217;t even get his stepdad Joseph&#8217;s <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genealogy_of_Jesus">ancestory</a> right). It would be nice, though, if people became skeptical in a more productive way than being an <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birther">Obama birther</a>. They could start by demanding that their god or their church give them better proof of the &#8220;greatest story ever told&#8221; than a <a title="Skeptic's Annotated Bible" href="http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/">very deeply flawed Bible</a>&#8230;</p>
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		<title>Quiz Show</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/20/quiz-show/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/05/20/quiz-show/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 20 May 2010 17:29:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dwindling in Unbelief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inerrant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Quiz Show]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1288</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Thanks to Dwindling In Unbelief, I just watched a funny video by nonstampcollector about contradictions in the Bible. The next time someone tries to tell you the Bible is inerrant, this should be a fun and educational way to show them that it&#8217;s most certainly not. I like the fact that the relevant passages are [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks to <a title="Dwindling In Unbelief" href="http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/2010/04/quiz-show-bible-contradictions.html">Dwindling In Unbelief</a>, I just watched a funny video by <a title="YouTube" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/NonStampCollector">nonstampcollector</a> about contradictions in the Bible. The next time someone tries to tell you the Bible is inerrant, this should be a fun and educational way to show them that it&#8217;s most certainly not. I like the fact that the relevant passages are displayed each time an answer is given so that believer and non-believer alike can fact-check. Enjoy!</p>
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		<title>Bible warning</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/04/04/bible-warning/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/04/04/bible-warning/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 04 Apr 2010 14:49:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Easter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NORAD]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[warning]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wikipedia]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1256</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Just in time for Easter, here&#8217;s a pretty scathing criticism I found of the Bible. Oh wait, that&#8217;s from Wikipedia&#8217;s page about NORAD tracking Santa on Christmas Eve. My bad.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Just in time for Easter, here&#8217;s a pretty scathing criticism I found of the Bible.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/Wiki.png"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1257" title="Wikipedia warnings about NORAD tracks Santa article" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/Wiki.png" alt="" width="500" height="110" /></a></p>
<p>Oh wait, that&#8217;s from Wikipedia&#8217;s page about <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NORAD_Tracks_Santa">NORAD tracking Santa on Christmas Eve</a>. My bad.</p>
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		<title>The Good Friday Turtle stops by (while James Madison does a facepalm)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/04/02/the-good-friday-turtle/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/04/02/the-good-friday-turtle/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 03 Apr 2010 04:23:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Christmas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[church and state]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Easter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Good Friday]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[heaven]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[human sacrifice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[James Madison]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[secular]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Separation of Church and State]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Shelby County]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[state-church]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TMNT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Turtles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wisconsin]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1225</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The yummy treats that the Good Friday Turtle (if he exists) might bring us next year! Unlike Christmas and Easter, which unfortunately have become widely commercialized and somewhat secularized, Good Friday remains very unambiguously a religious holiday: specifically a Christian one. Very few people would claim that Good Friday is a secular holiday. There is [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/t_3822.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1237" title="Turtles candies" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/t_3822.jpg" alt="" width="350" height="156" /></a><em>The yummy treats that the Good Friday Turtle (if he exists) might bring us next year!</em></p>
<p>Unlike Christmas and Easter, which unfortunately have become widely commercialized and somewhat secularized, Good Friday remains very unambiguously a religious holiday: specifically a Christian one. Very few people would claim that Good Friday is a secular holiday. There is no <strong>Good Friday Turtle</strong> that crawls around giving presents to good little girls and boys, no exchanging of Turtles chocolate and pecan candies, no <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TMNT">TMNT</a> marathons on TV, no playing of music from <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Turtles">The Turtles</a> (though &#8220;Happy Together&#8221; would make a nice holiday song!).</p>
<p>Although it&#8217;s nice to think about, no <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yes,_Virginia,_there_is_a_Santa_Claus">Virigina</a>, there is no Good Friday Turtle. <strong>The only reason that someone would treat Good Friday differently than any other day is for religious reasons. </strong>It is a religious observance of the day that some guy named Jesus, who only some people believe was the son of their god, died on a cross before going to hell for a couple of days, after which he miraculously (magically) rose from the dead to go back to heaven. All this trouble just so daddy would agree to let some people up into heaven, while leaving the rest burn for all eternity.</p>
<p>Personally, and for the record, I like the Good Friday Turtle idea much better, but the Constitution says people have a right to believe that whole God-sent-his-son-to-be-tortured-to-death mumbo jumbo. The Constitution also tells us however that <strong>government cannot endorse one religion over another.</strong> So when the <strong>Shelby County Clerk</strong> in Tennessee <a title="Unofficial DMV guide about Shelby County Clerk" href="http://local.dmv.org/tennessee/shelby-county/memphis/150-washington-ave/dmv-office-locations.php">reportedly closes on Good Friday,</a> or the <strong>state of Wisconsin</strong> <a title="FFRF" href="http://ffrf.org/news/releases/ffrf-won-ruling-14-years-ago-but-listing-continues/">recognizes Good Friday as a holiday</a>, these government entities certainly seem to be celebrating a Christian-only holiday.</p>
<p>So what&#8217;s the harm in these and other government agencies closing for Good Friday? What&#8217;s wrong with people having a day off or people having to wait until Monday to renew their licences? Giving this strictly religious holiday preferential treatment shows an <strong>official bias in favor of that religion (Christianity) over other religions or non-religion.</strong></p>
<p>Despite what many religious folk claim, <strong>the</strong><strong> founding fathers did  <em>not</em> intend the US to be a Christian nation</strong>, unless you think the entire Constititional Convention did a collective facepalm once they realized they had accidentally left &#8220;The United States is a Christian nation&#8221; out of the Preamble. Doesn&#8217;t seem likely to me.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/facepalm.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1243" title="Facepalm" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/facepalm-300x240.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="240" /><br />
</a><em> A photo of James Madison after realizing he and other founding fathers forgot to establish the United States as a Christian nation in the Constitution?? </em></p>
<p>The country was intentionally founded with freedom of religion in mind. People may celebrate their religious holidays if they so please, but government is not and should not be involved. <strong>Holidays of other religions besides Christianity are generally not observed or usually even mentioned by government bodies, and this is the way it should be.</strong> An occasional nod to Jewish or Muslim holidays may occur, but they normally don&#8217;t shut down government just because some religion somewhere thinks a given day is important to their deity of choice. And that&#8217;s the way it should be.</p>
<p>Government agencies get around this issue for Christmas because it has now taken on a largely (if not predominately) non-religious life of its own. Few would dispute this fact, although many might justifiably object to it.<strong> The main objections to Christmas arise when government steps over the line and starts inserting Christian words and symbols </strong>into what has become a secular celebration<strong>.</strong> Easter has followed Christmas along the path to secularization to a lesser extent (with pagan and secular symbols such as the Easter Bunny, colored eggs, marshmallow <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peeps">Peeps</a>); but since most government agencies are closed on weekends anyway, the issue of officially recognizing Easter by closing offices normally doesn&#8217;t come up.</p>
<p>But when government or government-funded agencies (schools, libraries, etc.) declare Good Friday to be a holiday and shut down in observance of that Holy Day, they are very clearly moving from secular celebration to religious observance. That&#8217;s something that government isn&#8217;t allowed to do. It wouldn&#8217;t be an honest argument to claim that Good Friday is just part of some sort of long weekend of a secularized Easter, since Christians obviously must separate Good Friday from Easter enough to  want a separate day to observe it. <strong>Good Friday is clearly, in practice and by definition, a Christian-only holiday. One that most religions don&#8217;t recognize, and some people object to.</strong> I don&#8217;t want my government telling me or my fellow citizens (whether child or adult) that one religion&#8217;s primitive idea of human sacrifice to appease the gods is something to be respected and revered. And the Constitution has my back on this one. Religions can teach this, but governments can&#8217;t endorse it by saying Good Friday is a holiday.</p>
<p>Unless The Good Friday Turtle stops by Tennessee, Wisconsin, or elsewhere next year, bringing candies and presents for all, I expect government to <strong>drop Good Friday as a holiday and get back to the business of running the country, not promoting religion</strong>.</p>
<p style="text-align: right;"><em>Source of Turtles image: <a href="http://www.candyfavorites.com/i/t_3822.jpg">http://www.candyfavorites.com/i/t_3822.jpg</a> and facepalm image: <a href="http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/facepalm.jpg">http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/facepalm.jpg</a></em></p>
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		<title>BBB: Brief Bible Blunders</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/03/07/bbb-brief-bible-blunders/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/03/07/bbb-brief-bible-blunders/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Mar 2010 17:37:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Brief Bible Blunders]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Skeptic's annotated bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[YouTube]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1207</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Thanks to the Skeptic&#8217;s Annotated Bible, I was recently introduced to a fun, yet educational series on YouTube called Brief Bible Blunders. I think this should be required viewing for any  inerrantists out there!]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/v7cBWm5mh5U&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/v7cBWm5mh5U&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>Thanks to the <a title="Skeptic's Annotated Bible" href="http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/whatsnew.html">Skeptic&#8217;s Annotated Bible</a>, I was recently introduced to a fun, yet educational series on YouTube called <a title="Brief Bible Blunders" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/ProfMTH#p/c/6F8036F680C1DBEB">Brief Bible Blunders</a>. I think this should be required viewing for any  inerrantists out there!</p>
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		<title>Amen: it&#8217;s like Abracadabra, only Christian!</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/02/21/amen-its-like-abracadabra-only-christian/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/02/21/amen-its-like-abracadabra-only-christian/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 21 Feb 2010 17:33:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1197</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here&#8217;s a video I saw posted on Facebook from YouTube&#8217;s Betty Bowers. Pretty funny stuff overall. I like the fact that there are a lot of jokes/gags going on in this video: the scroll at the bottom, the captions, the images in addition to what the &#8220;reporter&#8221; is saying). You&#8217;d have to watch it several [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Here&#8217;s a video I saw <a title="Facebook" href="http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%253A%252F%252Fwww.youtube.com%252Fwatch%253Fv%253Dm5QqEmBi8iw&amp;h=5bf90eae04411261305021e4e6601552&amp;ref=nf">posted on Facebook</a> from YouTube&#8217;s <a title="YouTube" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/MrsBettyBowers">Betty Bowers</a>. Pretty funny stuff overall. I like the fact that there are a lot of jokes/gags going on in this video: the scroll at the bottom, the captions, the images in addition to what the &#8220;reporter&#8221; is saying). You&#8217;d have to watch it several times to catch everything.</p>
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		<title>State-Church Separation (parody of &#8220;My Generation&#8221;)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/02/07/state-church-separation-parody-of-my-generation/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/02/07/state-church-separation-parody-of-my-generation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Feb 2010 11:04:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Chuch and State]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Memphis City Council]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mississippi]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Separation of Church and State]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[state and church]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1177</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here&#8217;s my latest project, which I&#8217;ve just posted on YouTube. It&#8217;s called &#8220;State-Church Separation&#8221;, and is a political parody of The Who&#8217;s song &#8220;My Generation.&#8221; I wrote the song last month and just finally was able to finish recording and make a quick YouTube video. It&#8217;s a very nice coincidence that The Who will be [...]]]></description>
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<p>Here&#8217;s my latest project, which I&#8217;ve just posted on YouTube. It&#8217;s called &#8220;State-Church Separation&#8221;, and is a political parody of The Who&#8217;s song &#8220;My Generation.&#8221; I wrote the song last month and just finally was able to finish recording and make a quick YouTube video. It&#8217;s a very nice coincidence that The Who will be doing the halftime show at the Super Bowl! When I found this out, it gave me even more motivation to finish this up and post it this weekend. (I&#8217;m an amateur singer and this is my first YouTube video, so please bear that in mind when viewing it or commenting!)</p>
<p>More and more, I&#8217;ve been reading about cases of government officials ignoring the constitutionally-mandated separation of church and state. I&#8217;ve reported on the Memphis City Council having official <a title="I Am The Blog" href="http://iamtheblog.com/wordpress2/2009/09/04/memphis-does-work-in-jesus-name-in-violation-of-constitution/">Chaplains of the Day who pronounce prayers</a>, often in Jesus&#8217; name, and get cuff links emblazoned with the city&#8217;s logo paid for at taxpayer expense.</p>
<p>Cases such as these, with the government promoting or endorsing religion, or even more egregious ones (such as a Mississippi police department <a title="FFRF" href="http://ffrf.org/news/releases/mississippi-police-department-inappropriately-entangled-in-religion-watchdo/">trying to collect funds to rebuild a church</a> in Haiti, saying &#8220;Jesus Christ [is] the answer for this life and the next&#8221;) are coming to light as more atheists, freethinkers, humanists, and other non-religious people are standing up for their rights. We are being marginalized in society, often by our own government at the local, state, and national levels.</p>
<p>This country was formed on religious freedom for individuals, not state-sponsored religion imposed on citizens. There are thousands of religious denominations in the United States, as well as millions of Americans who do not subscribe to any religious beliefs. The government should not be spending taxpayer money to support the religious practices of their choosing (nativity scenes, religious memorials, etc.). Our elected representantives, and other government officials, should not be holding religious prayers while doing government business for their constituents, many of whom may believe in a different god than that of the majority, or in no god at all. There is a time and place for everything. A church service is not the time or place for goverment business, and a city council meeting is not the time or place for prayer.</p>
<p>There is a growing movement of atheists and other freethinkers who are speaking out, and I thought a parody of &#8220;My Generation&#8221; might be able to capture this. Hopefully as more people speak out about this issue, public officials will realize that the rights of all citizens, no matter what religion if any they profess, need to be respected.</p>
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		<title>Joke from iPad announcement</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/01/29/joke-from-ipad-announcement/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/01/29/joke-from-ipad-announcement/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 29 Jan 2010 16:48:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[iPad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joke]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Moses]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tablet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ten Commandments]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1153</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Joke from the Apple iPad announcement. Screenshot from Apple&#8217;s special media event, Jan. 27 2010 Here&#8217;s a question: if God exists, why didn&#8217;t he send down the Ten Commandments on a tablet like Apple&#8217;s iPad instead of in stone form? That would have really knocked the socks off the Israelites. Image source: http://www.apple.com/ipad If Moses [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Joke from the Apple iPad announcement.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1155" title="iPad tablet joke" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/iPadtabletjoke-300x187.png" alt="" width="300" height="187" /><em>Screenshot from <a title="Apple" href="http://www.apple.com/quicktime/qtv/specialevent0110/">Apple&#8217;s special media event</a>, Jan. 27 2010</em></p>
<p>Here&#8217;s a question: if God exists, why didn&#8217;t he send down the Ten Commandments on a tablet like <a title="Apple" href="http://www.apple.com/ipad/">Apple&#8217;s iPad</a> instead of in stone form? That would have really knocked the socks off the Israelites.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1161" title="iPad image" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/hero_20100127-247x300.png" alt="" width="247" height="300" /><em>Image source: <a title="Apple" href="http://www.apple.com/ipad">http://www.apple.com/ipad</a></em></p>
<p>If Moses had come down that mountain with one of these babies thousands of years ago, *maybe* I&#8217;d be willing to entertain the idea that God exists&#8230;</p>
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		<title>This is why I blog about religion</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/01/12/this-is-the-reason-i-blog-about-religion/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2010/01/12/this-is-the-reason-i-blog-about-religion/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Jan 2010 18:41:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Alice]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Jason Mosler]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[YouTube]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1126</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes I wonder why I bother blogging about religion and atheism. Posting about funny animal videos on YouTube would be a lot cheerier, and I'm sure I'd get a lot more traffic on my blog. Then I see something like this letter to the editor, and I remember why I blog.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Sometimes I wonder why I bother blogging about religion and atheism. Does it really matter if I read and talk about religions I don&#8217;t even believe in anyway? I used to believe in God, after all, so why I don&#8217;t just let bygones be bygones, leave religion alone, and post about something a little more entertaining, like <a title="YouTube" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/dogsanimalscats?blend=1&amp;ob=4">funny animal videos on YouTube</a>! It&#8217;d be a lot cheerier, and I&#8217;m sure I&#8217;d get a lot more traffic on my blog.</p>
<p>Then I see something like this <a title="Peninsula Clarion" href="http://www.peninsulaclarion.com/stories/012907/letters_20070129001.shtml">letter to the editor</a>, and I remember why I blog.</p>
<p><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/clipping.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1129" title="Reader voices strong opinion on atheists Letter to the Editor" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/clipping.jpg" alt="" width="355" height="600" /></a></p>
<p>This letter to the editor is why I write my blog. I saw this <a title="Jason Mosler" href="http://www.jasonmosler.com/home/2010/1/12/ignorance-from-alaska.html">posted on the site</a> of fellow atheist blogger <a title="Jason Mosler" href="http://www.jasonmosler.com/">Jason Mosler</a>. Sure, it&#8217;d be easy to laugh this letter off as just the rantings of some religious nut. But reading it a second time, it disturbed me on a number of levels.</p>
<p>This is a real person, Alice, writing to a real small-town newspaper in Alaska just a few years ago (January 2007). Alice honestly thinks that:</p>
<ul>
<li><strong>People who don&#8217;t believe in God should be &#8220;<em>kicked [out] of the country</em>&#8220;.</strong></li>
<li><strong>The United States is based on the principle that you &#8220;<em>must believe</em>&#8221; in God.</strong></li>
<li><strong>You can believe in God &#8220;<em>any way you want</em>&#8220;, but Alice only cites mainstream Christian denominations as examples of acceptable beliefs</strong></li>
<li><strong>Atheists practice &#8220;<em>evil</em>&#8220;, although it is not explained what this means</strong></li>
<li><strong>Atheists are responsible for the &#8220;<em>ruin</em>&#8221; of America and for crime being &#8220;<em>rampant</em>&#8220;, even &#8220;<em>if they have never committed a crime</em>&#8220;.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>People like Alice are the reason I write this blog. Her religion has closed her mind so much that I&#8217;m sure she doesn&#8217;t even realize how hate-filled and out-of-touch with reality her letter is. For all we know, Alice is like many Christians: a kind-hearted, generous person in her day-to-day life who truly wants to do what&#8217;s right. But because her religion has taught her that people who don&#8217;t believe in her god are &#8220;evil&#8221;, all critical thought stops. She says and thinks the most horrible things because she knows she is right. Crime is up, atheists are in America, my faith says atheists are bad, so atheists are to blame and must be kicked out of society.</p>
<p>If Alice is like most people, she did not choose her religion growing up, but was brought up in a community that is largely if not exclusively Christian. She may never have met an open atheist in her life, but her faith has her so convinced that atheists are the cause of society&#8217;s ills that everything she sees (from currency to crime reports) serves to prove it to her. It would likely be difficult if not impossible to convince her otherwise.</p>
<p>We should feel sorry for Alice, for her head being filled with such hateful nonsense based on a book of fairy tales written thousands of years ago. But at the same time, I think we should also have a healthy dose of fear. We live in a society where it is still perfectly acceptable in many circles to openly hate and wish harm on people who don&#8217;t believe in God. And that is scary. There are unfortunately still people who think that Jews or Blacks, for example, should be kicked out of the country, but would a letter to the editor blaming Jews for America&#8217;s problems saying they should all be sent to Israel be published in a newspaper? Thankfully, there is very little chance of that happening. It&#8217;s no longer acceptable to openly say such things in society about most minority groups. But for some reason, it&#8217;s still okay to say just about anything you want about atheists, no matter how bigoted or unsupported it is. Many readers I&#8217;m sure said or thought &#8220;Amen&#8221; upon reading Alice&#8217;s letter.</p>
<p>Anti-atheist sentiment is what is &#8220;rampant&#8221; in our country these days. As long as there are people who believe that non-believers are evil and don&#8217;t deserve to be citizens, then my blog has a purpose. People need to know that religion is brainwashing good people into believing nonsense and spreading hate. There are people who strongly believe that atheists don&#8217;t deserve the same rights as everyone else, some of whom are actively trying to push their bigoted beliefs onto the country as a whole.</p>
<p>If even one believer sees this post and thinks about their belief, or one non-believer realizes how important it is to help change minds about atheists, then writing this blog is definitely worth it.</p>
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		<title>The Onion admits Christian bias</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/29/the-onion-admits-christian-bias/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/29/the-onion-admits-christian-bias/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 29 Dec 2009 20:19:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[The Onion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1073</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here is the cover of the most recent print edition of The Onion. I scanned and uploaded it since it doesn&#8217;t appear to be in the online version. I think it pretty much sums up the situation for all major media outlets in the US (but ironically enough, not The Onion itself since they often [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Here is the cover of the most recent print edition of <a title="The Onion" href="http://theonion.com/">The Onion</a>. I scanned and uploaded it since it doesn&#8217;t appear to be in the online version. I think it pretty much sums up the situation for all major media outlets in the US (but ironically enough, not The Onion itself since they often publish irreligious stories).</p>
<p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1072" title="The Onion's Christian Bias" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/img230.jpg" alt="" width="556" height="685" /></p>
<p>UPDATE: I figured it said Merry Christmas, but it looks like I was wrong. According to a <a title="Reddit" href="http://www.reddit.com/r/reddit.com/comments/ajqsz/the_onion_admits_christian_bias/?sort=hot">discussion on Reddit,</a> the Arabic text here means &#8220;Happy Eid&#8221;, but there&#8217;s a mistake in the Arabic apparently, either intentionally or not. Thanks to <a title="Jason Mosler" href="http://www.jasonmosler.com/">Jason Mosler </a>for submitting the post to Reddit.</p>
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		<title>A Christmas medley with Santa and Jesus</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/18/south-park-christmas-medley/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/18/south-park-christmas-medley/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Dec 2009 23:04:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christmas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lounge act]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[medley]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[South Park]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1047</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Nothing brings more joy to this atheist's heart around Christmas time than seeing the season's top two fictional characters, Santa and Jesus, doing a lounge act together.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="480" height="400" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="bgcolor" value="#000000" /><param name="flashvars" value="autoPlay=false&amp;dist=www.southparkstudios.com&amp;orig=" /><param name="src" value="http://media.mtvnservices.com/mgid:cms:item:southparkstudios.com:151730" /><param name="wmode" value="window" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="480" height="400" src="http://media.mtvnservices.com/mgid:cms:item:southparkstudios.com:151730" allowfullscreen="true" wmode="window" flashvars="autoPlay=false&amp;dist=www.southparkstudios.com&amp;orig=" bgcolor="#000000"></embed></object></p>
<p>Nothing brings more joy to this atheist&#8217;s heart around Christmas time than seeing the season&#8217;s top two fictional characters, Santa and Jesus, doing a lounge act together. In this classic clip from <a title="South Park" href="http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/151730">South Park</a>, Santa and Jesus are singing together in a night club, and Santa gets pretty peeved at Jesus. (This is the clean version of the clip; I have one where the expletive Santa uses is not deleted). Singers put out Christmas medleys all the time, but this is by far my favorite Christmas medley.</p>
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		<title>More festive tunes &#8212; 4 songs by Weird Al</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/15/more-holiday-tunes-4-songs-by-weird-al/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/15/more-holiday-tunes-4-songs-by-weird-al/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 Dec 2009 01:36:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<category><![CDATA[Weird Al Yankovic]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=1013</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For my second installment of holiday songs, I've decided to feature not one, not two, but count 'em -- FOUR "Weird Al" Yankovic songs. With his Christmas songs being so violent and laughingly depressing, you get the impression that it must not have been his favorite holiday growing up.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>For my second installment of holiday songs, I&#8217;ve decided to feature not one, not two, but count &#8216;em &#8212; FOUR <a title="&quot;Weird Al&quot; Yankovic" href="http://weirdal.com">&#8220;Weird Al&#8221; Yankovic</a> songs. As far as I know, Weird Al has never come out as being irreligious or a freethinker, and he may be Christian (in fact, a question from 1995 in the Ask Al archive from his site includes only a very brief answer to the question of whether he &#8220;would consider himself a Christian&#8221;. His response to the questioner is simply &#8220;Yes&#8221;). But nothing is sacred in Weird Al&#8217;s universe of songwriting, and I&#8217;m including four examples of this.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EGdrMOttV_s&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EGdrMOttV_s&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>* &#8220;Christmas at Ground Zero&#8221; is one of my favorite Christmas songs because it definitely desacrilizes the Christmas season and has an anti-war message. It describes a &#8220;jolly&#8221; Christmas during a nuclear holocaust and includes vintage 50s and 60s video clips from the good old days when they used to scare kids by practicing for nuclear fallout by ducking and covering, as if that would really help if your city is hit by a nuke. (The song was written long before 9-11 occurred, in case you&#8217;re curious, so no relation to that Ground Zero). EDIT: click <a title="Christmas At Ground Zero" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGdrMOttV" target="_blank">here</a> to view in a new window if clicking on the embed doesn&#8217;t work.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/cSs3FyeThM0&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/cSs3FyeThM0&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>* &#8220;The Night Santa Went Crazy&#8221; is a (slightly) less macabre and funnier take on the Christmas holiday. As the title might suggest, a &#8220;disgruntled&#8221; Saint Nick finally snaps and goes postal in the North Pole. The video I&#8217;ve embedded below is a claymation-type take on the song that someone apparently did for their thesis. An &#8220;extra gory&#8221; alternate live version of the song can be seen <a title="The Night Santa Went Crazy, Extra Gory version" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcm2pLR2e3U" target="_blank">here</a>. With his two Christmas songs being so violent and laughingly depressing, you get the impression that it must not have been his favorite holiday growing up. (Rumor has it, he got notebook paper as a present one Christmas!)</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/k76IGLi6jWI&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/k76IGLi6jWI&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>* &#8220;Weasel Stomping Day&#8221; is perhaps the least obvious choice to include here, but it actually may come the close to criticizing religion of the bunch. As you might guess, people go around stomping weasels in the song, but if you listen more closely to the lyrics, you&#8217;ll hear several subtle freethought-like messages (&#8220;Bash their weasely skulls right in / It&#8217;s tradition, that makes it okay&#8221;), and a few nods to Christmas in the video that suggest that he had religious holidays on his mind</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="344" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lOfZLb33uCg&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lOfZLb33uCg&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p>* &#8220;Amish Paradise&#8221; is one of Weird Al&#8217;s best-known songs. It&#8217;s a parody of Ganga&#8217;s Paradise by Coolio (the other three are Weird Al originals). The song isn&#8217;t specifically about a holiday, so I&#8217;m bending the definition of &#8220;festive&#8221; tunes here, but it is the only one that openly pokes fun at religious extremism, that of the &#8220;crazy Mennonites&#8221; (isn&#8217;t that redundant?) the Amish are. It&#8217;s also the only video I know of that features both <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Florence_Henderson">Florence Henderson</a> (the mom from the Brady Bunch) and a depiction of hell!</p>
<p>I wonder what Weird Al, who pokes fun at the Amish for &#8220;shunning fancy things like electricity&#8221;, would think of the <a title="I Am The Blog" href="http://iamtheblog.com/wordpress2/?p=288">recent stories</a> of extremist orthodox Jews attacking a journalist using an electronic device on the Sabbath, or complaining about electric lights turning on at their apartments on the Sabbath.</p>
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		<title>Barker visit, Part 2: roundup and personal reaction</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/12/10/barker-visit-part-2-roundup-and-reaction/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 10 Dec 2009 13:11:45 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[Part 2 on Dan Barker's visit on December 3 in Memphis. Perhaps the most notable thing about Dan Barker's talk was the fact that it was a fair-minded plea for state-church separation, filled with anecdotes, examples, and humor that could appeal to both believers and non-believers.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-969" title="Dan Barker" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/6817y51c.jpg" alt="Dan Barker" width="130" height="197" />Photo source : <a title="The Daily Helmsman" href="http://tinyurl.com/yem5k3y">The Daily Helmsman</a></p>
<p>Here is Part 2 of my roundup on Dan Barker&#8217;s visit on December 3 in Memphis. In this part, I&#8217;ll mention a few more highlights as well as my personal reaction and thoughts. For Part I, <a title="I Am The Blog" href="http://iamtheblog.com/wordpress2/?p=972">click here</a>. For an excellent recap of the Dan Barker event, read <a title="Mississippi Atheists" href="http://www.msatheists.org/2009/12/recap-of-dan-barkers-talk-at-university.html">Oliver&#8217;s post</a> (oliver_poe on Twitter) on the <a title="Mississippi Atheists" href="http://www.msatheists.org">Mississippi Atheists website</a>.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve already mentioned in my first post much of his talk about state-church separation, so I will focus on other aspects here. Perhaps the most notable thing about Dan Barker&#8217;s talk was the fact that it was a fair-minded plea for state-church separation, filled with anecdotes, examples, and humor that could appeal to both believers and non-believers. While Barker does also talk on things such as Biblical errancy, his goal in this talk was not to promote an atheist agenda but speak on state-church issues.</p>
<p>A nice example of this were Dan&#8217;s arguments <em>defending</em> religious believers. (No, that is not a typo.) Unlike the exaggerated image of angry, close-minded atheists held by some believers (and too often painted in the media), Dan Barker made it very clear at several points that religious people do a lot of good in the world.</p>
<p>One believer argued during the Q &amp; A that humans by nature are not altruistic, that we are selfish and introverted by nature. Barker countered that humans are actually very social animals, and that being empathetic and altruistic comes naturally to people. Barker said that Christians, believers of different faiths, as well as nonbelievers, are just as good and kind at heart. Because of this, he argued the human qualities of kindness and generosity &#8220;transcend&#8221; religion. Instead of just attacking religion, Barker was trying to find common ground among believers and non-believers.</p>
<p>Dan Barker also made it clear that he does not think that the government should go on the offensive against religion, just keep religion out of government. He cited the example of the much-mediatized solstace plaques that have been placed in a few state capitals (including Olympia, Washington; Springfield, Illinois; Madison, Wisconsin). The <a title="FFRF" href="http://ffrf.org/news/2008/illsignstolen.php">plaques</a>, which state among other things that <em><strong>&#8220;There are no gods, no devils, no angels, no heaven or hell&#8221;</strong></em> are only placed by the Freedom From Religion Foundation in response to Christmas displays in state capitals.</p>
<p>In response to a questioner about the goal of such plaques, Barker made it clear that they are actually pleased when governments choose to ban all displays during the holiday season, which is what happened in Olympia after the FFRF&#8217;s plaque spurred a number of groups to post displays in addition to the Christmas one. Barker argued that banning these diplays was a victory since there shouldn&#8217;t be &#8220;<em><strong>religion OR irreligion</strong></em>&#8221; (emphasis his) in government buildings, including religious prayers.</p>
<p>He argued that non-believers deserve just as much protection as belivers both in Memphis and nationally. Using national statitics, he argued that few politicans would openly come out with policies that would discriminate against Jews, who represent a little over 1% of the population, while many politicians openly oppose atheists and agnostics, who represent between 9-10% of the population. The <a title="Memphis City Council" href="http://www.cityofmemphis.org/framework.aspx?page=689">Memphis City Council</a>, like all government bodies, should represent and support the rights of all citizens, not just believers. Instead of having Christian or other religious prayers at its meetings, the Council should neither support nor attack any religion. (As an atheist, he likened the situation of seeing councilmembers praying to seeing an airline pilot pray. A pilot should be confident in his flying skills, not asking for outside help to fly the plane. Barker joked that if he saw a pilot praying before take-off, he&#8217;d get right off the plane.)</p>
<p>Barker also mentioned the Founding Fathers, at a number of junctures: something that believers often do while trying to defend religious incursions into government. Barker mentioned the <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jefferson_Bible">Jefferson Bible</a>, for which Jefferson literally cut out with a pair of scissors all of the superstitious (miracles, etc.) parts of the New Testament. He said that while some founders were Christians, most were Deists who wanted religion separate from government. He said that as a believer, he used to think of the Pilgrims and Founders as being related to each other, when in reality they were separated by over 100 years and religious beliefs.</p>
<p>In order to address the fact that the Founders didn&#8217;t put the phrase &#8220;<em><strong>wall of separation between church and state</strong></em>&#8221; in the Constitution (Jefferson wrote this in a letter), Barker said that the concept is there even if the phrase isn&#8217;t. He gave other examples of phrases that aren&#8217;t in the Constitution or Bill of Rights that have become commonplace descriptions of the ideas found there: the words &#8220;<em><strong>Bill of Rights</strong></em>&#8220;, &#8220;<em><strong>interstate commerce</strong></em>&#8220;, &#8220;<em><strong>separation of powers</strong></em>&#8220;, and &#8220;<em><strong>checks and balances</strong></em>&#8221; also are not in the constitution either, but you don&#8217;t hear religious people criticizing those who talk about the Bill of Rights saying there is not such thing.</p>
<p>Barker did not completely spare religious teachings in his talk, however. There were a few critiques about religion, the majority of which were in direct response to questions attacking church-state separation or atheism. Dan Barker poked fun at the creation story in the Bible, which includes a talking snake (Barker, who is part Native American, mentioned that his tribe also had a snake myth). He also mentioned that Jesus clearly supports slavery in the New Testament, using it as an example in his parables (saying you should beat some slaves less than others) instead of speaking out against it.</p>
<p>Barker mentioned that Jefferson famously said that finding good in the Bible was like trying to find &#8220;<em><strong>diamonds in a dunghill</strong></em>.&#8221; <em> </em>Barker also defended his right in the public sphere to say that he finds the teachings of Christianity, and the Christian god, to be morally offensive, in particular the idea that humans are by nature unclean and sinful. He said that real life debunks this notion, that we see headlines of criminals in the paper (of which religious leaders aren&#8217;t exempt, he pointed out) because they are exceptions to the norm. If that&#8217;s how everyone was, then it wouldn&#8217;t be news. He also cited studies have shown that countries that are generally areligious, such as Nordic countries, often rank as the happiest and least plagued by crime and other social problems.</p>
<p>There is more I could comment on, but I think that sums up the main points of interest about the talk that weren&#8217;t covered in my first post or Oliver&#8217;s post.</p>
<p>I have a personal confession to make: I am somewhat of an admirer of Dan Barker. I was very religious when I was younger, and can identify with Dan Barker&#8217;s journey from belief to unbelief. My grandmother thought I would be good pastor material, and I seriously considered becoming a pastor. So when I first heard about Dan Barker, a minister-turned-atheist, his story really hit home with me. I&#8217;ve read his book godless, am a faithful (or faithless) listener of <a title="FFRF" href="http://ffrf.org/radio/">Freethought Radio</a>, and have listened to and viewed many of his talks and debates online. So I was very much looking forward to seeing what he had to say about the Memphis situation, and state-church separation in general.</p>
<p>After the talk, I waited in line to meet Dan Barker. He talked to me briefly and was very personable both to me and the people who were in line ahead of me (he even gave out a free copy of his book to someone!). I asked him to sign my copy of his book, and I mentioned to him that I am a member of the Freedom From Religion Foundation. I had a bookmark &#8220;<em><strong>Imagine No Religion</strong></em>&#8220;, which FFRF had sent me for free when I ordered his book from them. I showed it to him and the person next to me said she thought at first I was trying to give him a religious tract!</p>
<p>Since I am not &#8220;out&#8221; as an atheist, except to my wife, standing in line in a public venue to meet Dan Barker and have him sign a book entitled &#8220;<a title="FFRF" href="http://ffrf.org/shop/books"><em>godless</em></a>&#8221; for me was a big, and somewhat frightening, step for me. While I did not come out and say &#8220;I am an atheist&#8221;, it was the closest I&#8217;ve ever come to be open about my atheism in person. I told him my name for him to sign it, but I don&#8217;t think anyone there knew or recognized me, so I guess I am still officially in the closet for now. Dan Barker was wearing an &#8220;A&#8221; pin, part of the Richard Dawkins coming out campaign for atheists. Maybe someday soon I will feel comfortable enough with friends and family, and secure enough in my job, to be an open atheist, too.</p>
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		<title>Sick (and sick of religion, too)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/11/07/sick-and-sick-of-religion-too/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/11/07/sick-and-sick-of-religion-too/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 07 Nov 2009 18:44:11 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[I have been sick for the last week and am still recovering after being in the emergency room last Friday. Maybe if I just prayed and accepted Jesus in my life, I would get better faster? With the answer, here&#8217;s a video I saw today, posted on www.jasonmosler.com.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: left;">I have been sick for the last week and am still recovering after being in the emergency room last Friday. Maybe if I just prayed and accepted Jesus in my life, I would get better faster? With the answer, here&#8217;s a video I saw today, posted on <a title="Jason Mosler" href="http://www.jasonmosler.com/home/2009/11/5/the-story-of-suzie.html">www.jasonmosler.com</a>.</p>
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		<title>All good cars don&#8217;t go to heaven</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/09/01/all-good-cars-dont-go-to-heaven/</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Sep 2009 07:35:52 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[I've been dealing with one heart-wrenching personal issue recently— I've had to come to terms with is the fact that cars, just like humans, do not live eternally. ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: verdana,geneva,helvetica,arial,ms sans serif; font-size: x-small;"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://z.about.com/d/webclipart/1/0/N/h/1/cloud5.jpg" alt="http://z.about.com/d/webclipart/1/0/N/h/1/cloud5.jpg - 18.8 K" width="253" height="184" /> <em>Clip art by <a title="About.com" href="http://webclipart.about.com/od/placephoto/l/blclou5.htm" title="About.com">Bobby Peachey</a> .</em> </span></p>
<p>It&#8217;s been an incredibly busy two weeks due to work and other issues. In particular, I&#8217;ve been dealing with one heart-wrenching personal issue&#8230; I&#8217;ve had to come to terms with the fact that cars, just like humans, do not live eternally.</p>
<p>Our decade-old car recently drove its last mile. He was a good car, chugging along until the very end. He was a reliable car overall, but he did have his little quirks we had come to love: the increasingly loud purr/growl his engine made; his overhead light that would only intermittently help us find things in the dark; his air conditioning that only had two working settings: full-blast and off. He sputtered his last about a week ago, in a puff of white smoke as he pulled into the driveway.</p>
<p>Perhaps because of being raised a Christian, I briefly considered the fact that our car might be in a better place right now. He could be doing a victory lap in that big racetrack in the sky, with a pit crew to attend to his every need.</p>
<p>But are there free oil changes and tuneups forever in the great beyond for our dearly-departed cars? Although there is no way to prove it, and I doubt we&#8217;ll ever know for sure whether or not there is a car heaven, I have a sneaking suspicion that this isn&#8217;t the case.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve come to the conclusion that there&#8217;s no need for car heaven. Our car gave his all here on Earth and had a long and full experience, traveling over 120,000 miles of this great land we call America. Some of his parts will be used to keep other cars going. (Our car never signed a donor card, but we know he wouldn&#8217;t want it any other way.) And he will give way to a new generation of cars that inspire hope, evolving to become more and more fuel efficient as the years go by.</p>
<p>What matters is that he made a difference in our lives while he was still running. There&#8217;s no need for a car heaven. And there&#8217;s no need for us to mourn his death. And no time, either—we need to find a new car, and fast!</p>
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		<title>Furniture has surpassed Christianity as world religion (IKEA overtakes INRI)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/08/10/ikea-surpasses-inri-more-ikea-catalogs-than-bibles/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:25:02 +0000</pubDate>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=693</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Well, it's official — furniture has surpassed Christianity as the number one religion in the world. Specifically, there are more IKEA catalogues printed every year than there are Bibles. IKEA is in and INRI (the initials seen on many crucifixes) is out.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;">
<p style="text-align: center;"><em><a href="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/Ikea.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1097" title="Ikea" src="http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/wp-content/uploads/Ikea.jpg" alt="" width="128" height="170" /></a></em><em>My parody of an INRI cross I found on <a title="fotosearch.com" href="http://www.fotosearch.com/dg-vinyl-clip-art/faith-religion/SUE108/3/">fotosearch.com</a> </em></p>
<p>Well, it&#8217;s official — furniture has surpassed Christianity as the most important religion in the world. Specifically, according to a number of sources (<a title="Business Week" href="http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/05_46/b3959001.htm">Business Week</a> , <a title="Mental Floss" href="http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/31198">mental_floss</a> , <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IKEA_Catalogue">Wikipedia</a> etc.), there are more IKEA catalogues printed every year than there are bibles. So I guess IKEA is in and <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/INRI">INRI</a> (the initials seen on many crucifixes) is out.</p>
<p>This apparently isn&#8217;t exactly news, as it&#8217;s been the case since at least 2006, but I hadn&#8217;t heard about it until now. (Thanks to Twitter users <a title="Twitter" href="http://twitter.com/amiable84">amiable84</a> and <a title="Twitter" href="http://twitter.com/mental_floss">mental_floss</a> for pointing this out.) The Bible still holds the all-time record apparently, and it would take IKEA some time to catch up considering <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gutenberg_Bible">the Bible&#8217;s over 500 year head start</a> .</p>
<p>Based on the Business Week article, IKEA seems to have been the one to have publicized their achievement originally, but I can&#8217;t find this information on their site now. Maybe they remembered what happened what happened to John Lennon when he said the Beatles were <a title="Wikipedia" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Lennon#cite_ref-LennonIKnew_71-0">more popular than Jesus</a> was.</p>
<p>I have mixed feelings on this. While I&#8217;m glad that the Bible is no longer the most printed book in the world, couldn&#8217;t something else besides a catalogue have surpassed it? We&#8217;ve gone from worshiping God to worshiping furniture. I guess it&#8217;s a step up, since furniture actually exists.</p>
<p>I might have preferred something else overtake the Bible in number of copies printed: a science book, a freethought book, a work promoting peace, or pretty much any (other) work of fiction besides the Bible (since the Bible is, of course, largely fictional). Maybe in another 500 years?</p>
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		<title>Abraham&#8217;s sacrifice of Isaac (comedy)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/21/abrahams-sacrifice-of-isaac-comedy/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/21/abrahams-sacrifice-of-isaac-comedy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 21 Jul 2009 14:04:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=519</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here's a hilarious sketch by That Mitchell and Webb Look, a British comedy show, about God asking Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><object width="425" height="344" height="344" width="425" data="http://www.youtube.com/v/hY4pRf1PQZI&amp;color1=0x5d1719&amp;color2=0xcd311b&amp;hl=en&amp;feature=player_embedded&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/hY4pRf1PQZI&amp;color1=0x5d1719&amp;color2=0xcd311b&amp;hl=en&amp;feature=player_embedded&amp;fs=1" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /></object></p>
<p>Here&#8217;s a hilarious sketch by <a title="That Mitchell and Webb Look" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/That_Mitchell_and_Webb_Look" title="That Mitchell and Webb Look">That Mitchell and Webb Look</a> , a British comedy show, about God asking Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac. Thanks to <a title="Unreasonable Faith" href="http://unreasonablefaith.com/2009/07/20/god-tells-abraham-to-kill-his-son/" title="Unreasonable Faith">Unreasonable Faith</a> and <a title="Friendly Atheist" href="http://friendlyatheist.com/2009/07/20/abraham-and-isaac-a-revised-version/" title="Friendly Atheist">Friendly Atheist</a> for posting this.</p>
<p>You should definitely check out other irreligious and skeptical skits online by them on YouTube or elsewhere. I can&#8217;t imagine stuff like this being broadcast in the US. Maybe on cable/satellite, but even then probably not.</p>
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		<title>YouTube cartoon — Jephthah&#8217;s daughter (Judges 11)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/13/youtube-cartoon-%e2%80%94-jephthahs-daughter-judges-11/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/13/youtube-cartoon-%e2%80%94-jephthahs-daughter-judges-11/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:24:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=340</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A video about the story of Jephthah and his daughter, in Judges 11. It features God talking to Jephthah and a dramatic, but biblically-accurate ending.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I just saw a funny yet thought-provoking video mentioned on the blog <a title="Asking the God Question" href="http://askingthegodquestion.blogspot.com/2009/06/personal-favorite-of-mine.html?showComment=1247511431849#c199601429092985915" title="Asking the God Question">Asking the God Question</a> . The video is about the story of Jephthah and his daughter, in Judges 11. It features God talking to Jephthah and a dramatic, but biblically-accurate ending.</p>
<p>If you aren&#8217;t familiar with the story, you can just watch the video or see the <a title="The Brick Testament" href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/judges/jephthah_kills_his_virgin_daughter/jg11_34.html" title="The Brick Testament">Brick Testament version</a> for a quick overview. The video also mentions a number of related issues in it and gives the Bible verses referenced.</p>
<p><object width="425" height="344" height="344" width="425" data="http://www.youtube.com/v/Pt66kbYmXXk&amp;rel=0&amp;color1=0xb1b1b1&amp;color2=0xcfcfcf&amp;hl=fr&amp;feature=player_embedded&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always" /><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Pt66kbYmXXk&amp;rel=0&amp;color1=0xb1b1b1&amp;color2=0xcfcfcf&amp;hl=fr&amp;feature=player_embedded&amp;fs=1" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /></object></p>
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		<title>I Am The Blog — as heard on Dogma Free America!</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/13/i-am-the-blog-%e2%80%94-as-heard-on-dogma-free-america/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/13/i-am-the-blog-%e2%80%94-as-heard-on-dogma-free-america/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:57:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=332</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I listened to the most recent episode of Dogma Free America last night, and was shocked to hear an email I had sent in read on the air!!]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://dogmafreeamerica.com"><img src="http://up2.podbean.com/image-logos/20983_logo.jpg" alt="" width="194" height="194" /> </a></p>
<p>I listened to the most recent episode of <a title="Dogma Free America" href="http://dogmafreeamerica.com/index.php?post_id=498501" title="Dogma Free America">Dogma Free America</a> last night, and was shocked to hear an email I had sent in read on the air!! (If you can say &quot;on the air&quot; for a podcast.)</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s a link to <a title="Dogma Free America — Podcast 94" href="http://dogmafreeamerica.com/index.php?post_id=500739" title="Dogma Free America — Podcast 94">Episode 94</a> , which features among other more important things, my email at the end. Since I sent it in anonymously as &quot;I Am the Blog&quot; and not under my real name (since I&#8217;m still not &quot;out&quot; as an atheist yet), I just assumed it would not be read. My email was about the news story Dogma Free America had reported on in <a title="Dogma Free America — Podcast 93" href="http://dogmafreeamerica.com/index.php?post_id=498501" title="Dogma Free America — Podcast 93">Episode 93</a> about whether or not having a living area without motion-sensor lights was a human right for strict observers of the Sabbath (which I referenced to briefly in a previous <a title="I Am The Blog" href="http://iamtheblog.com/wordpress2/?p=288" title="I Am The Blog">blog post</a> ).</p>
<p>As I mentioned in my <a title="I Am The Blog — Links" href="http://iamtheblog.com/links.html" title="I Am The Blog — Links">links section</a> on my main website, Dogma Free America (hosted by <a title="Rich Orman on Twitter" href="http://twitter.com/richorman" title="Rich Orman on Twitter">Rich Orman</a> ) is one of my favorite podcasts because it combines humor with serious commentary about almost-too-crazy-to-be-true news stories related to religion. The often-used tagline &quot;Because dogma makes you crazy&quot; is a good indication of what the show is about.</p>
<p>If you have not done so yet, be sure to check out Dogma Free America.</p>
<p>P.S. The part of my email which was not read (because as with some of my posts, my email was fairly long!) had to do with a discussion from an earlier podcast on whether or not Dogma Free America should be listened to at 2x speed (which is now possible on iPhones). In a nutshell, I said I thought this was okay provided that you listen to the most important parts of the show (the intro, the funny accents Rich does, and &quot;Jackass of the Week&quot;) at regular speed.</p>
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		<title>Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter) comes out as an atheist</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/08/daniel-radcliffe-harry-potter-comes-out-as-an-atheist/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/08/daniel-radcliffe-harry-potter-comes-out-as-an-atheist/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:20:03 +0000</pubDate>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=299</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This news may be shocking to many fans, but according to the UK newspaper The Telegraph, actor Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter fame has admitted in an interview that he's an atheist.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01436/potter-main_1436374f.jpg" alt="It is heartening news for 'nerds' everywhere. Daniel Radcliffe, star of Harry Potter, has disclosed that he endured years of bullying by classmates who considered him 'uncool' - but is now having the last laugh." width="107" height="141" /> <em><span class="caption">Harry Potter actor Daniel Radcliffe</span> <span class="credit">Photo: Alan Clarke courtesy of Esquire</span> </em></p>
<p>I&#8217;m not a huge Harry Potter fan, but I know several people who are. This news may be shocking to many fans, but according to the UK newspaper <a title="The Telegraph" href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/harry-potter/5734000/Daniel-Radcliffe-a-cool-nerd.html" title="The Telegraph">The Telegraph</a> , actor <a title="Wikipedia — Daniel Radcliffe" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_Radcliffe" title="Wikipedia — Daniel Radcliffe">Daniel Radcliffe</a> has admitted in an interview that he&#8217;s an atheist. I saw this on <a title="American Freethought" href="http://www.americanfreethought.com/wordpress/2009/07/05/harry-potter-is-an-atheist/#comments" title="American Freethought">American Freethought</a> and it doesn&#8217;t appear to have hit the main headlines in the US as of writing.</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><em><strong>In an interview with Esquire magazine, Radcliffe risked the US box office    prospects of the new Harry Potter film by declaring himself to be an atheist. [...]<br />
</strong> </em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><em><strong>Radcliffe has been reticent on the subject of religion in the past, but in an    interview to promote the latest instalment in the film franchise, Harry    Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, released on July 15, he said: &quot;I&#8217;m an    atheist, but I&#8217;m very relaxed about it. I don&#8217;t preach my atheism, but I    have a huge amount of respect for people like Richard Dawkins who do.    Anything he does on television, I will watch.&quot;</strong> </em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><em><strong>He joked: &quot;There we go, Dan, that&#8217;s half of America that&#8217;s not going to    see the next Harry Potter film on the back of that comment.&quot;</strong> </em></p>
<p>There is no way that a comment like this from the actor who plays Harry Potter, a book and film series which has been strongly criticized by some on the Religious Right (for witchcraft, of course), will not have some effect on ticket sales right before the latest installment of the series is about to hit theatres! Not to mention future DVD and book sales in the US. It&#8217;s admirable that he is being open about his atheism, but I&#8217;m sure the studios and publishers must be furious and/or scared out of their seats right now.</p>
<p>Maybe his announcing he&#8217;s an atheist will help some Harry Potter fans consider religion in a light they may not have already. Especially since studies have shown that the <a title="I Am The Blog — Pew study on generation gap for religion" href="http://iamtheblog.com/wordpress2/?p=33" title="I Am The Blog — Pew study on generation gap for religion">younger generation is the least likely to find religion to be important</a> and that the <a title="IAmTheBlog Xanga — The Good News" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/695175413/the-good-news/" title="IAmTheBlog Xanga — The Good News">trend in the US is away from organized religion</a> (the only group to gain in the recent <a title="ARIS" href="http://www.americanreligionsurvey-aris.org/reports/ARIS_Report_2008.pdf" title="ARIS">ARIS survey</a> was non-religious, who are now at 15% of the US), having a very-well known celebrity like Daniel Radcliffe openly declaring he&#8217;s an atheist could really open up some minds.</p>
<p>I think the more celebrities and scientists who &quot;come out&quot; as atheists, the more it will be an acceptable viewpoint, and the more people will examine their own beliefs. A debate of ideas is a good thing. Assuming the news does hit the radar in the US, I just hope that any protests by Christians or other believers are peaceful.</p>
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		<title>Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert— religious, atheist, or a-religious humor?</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/02/jon-stewart-and-stephen-colbert%e2%80%94-religious-atheist-or-a-religious-humor/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/07/02/jon-stewart-and-stephen-colbert%e2%80%94-religious-atheist-or-a-religious-humor/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Jul 2009 17:57:34 +0000</pubDate>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=69</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One thing I&#8217;ve liked about The Colbert Report (remember not to pronounce the t&#8217;s in your head!) The Daily Show and is that they fairly often bring up religion, nearly always poking fun at it. When I was still not-a-Christian-but-still-not-a-full-blown-atheist-yet, &#34;This Week in God &#34; (here&#8217;s another one that I hadn&#8217;t seen) in particularly made [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.sojo.net/index.cfm?"><img src="http://www.sojo.net//magazine/archives/soj0907/images/soj0907.jpg" alt="" /> </a> <a href="http://www.sojo.net/index.cfm?"> </a></p>
<p>One thing I&#8217;ve liked about <a href="http://www.colbertnation.com/home">The Colbert Report</a> (remember not to pronounce the t&#8217;s in your head!) <a title="The Daily Show" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/" title="The Daily Show">The Daily Show</a> and is that they fairly often bring up religion, nearly always poking fun at it. When I was still not-a-Christian-but-still-not-a-full-blown-atheist-yet, &quot;<a title="This Week In God" href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?title=this-week-in-god&amp;videoId=113960" title="This Week In God">This Week in God</a> &quot; (here&#8217;s <a title="This Week In God" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4wXHnGx0Bs" title="This Week In God">another one</a> that I hadn&#8217;t seen) in particularly made me feel like it was okay to make fun of religion — that it wasn&#8217;t off-limits to criticize the stranger parts of religions and the actions of their adherents.</p>
<p>So I&#8217;ve often wondered, what do Stewart and Colbert <strong>really</strong> think about religion? Not what they think will be a good punchline for a joke, but their actual beliefs? Are they trying to get people to question religion, or at least the more dogmatic aspects of it? I used to think they were atheists or agnostics but just didn&#8217;t want to come out and say so (and risk offending certain segments of their audience). But through the years, more clues have surfaced.</p>
<p>I no longer watch each show &quot;religiously&quot; as I used to (I used to participate in Colbert Nation&#8217;s forums on a daily basis), but still catch them from time to time. And one show I caught was when Jon Stewart <a title="The Daily Show — Sandra Day O'Connor" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=220242" title="The Daily Show — Sandra Day O'Connor">interviewed</a> former Supreme Court Justice <a title="Sandra Day O'Connor" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sandra_Day_O%27Connor" title="Sandra Day O'Connor">Sandra Day O&#8217;Connor</a> .</p>
<table style="font-family: arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 11px; line-height: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; color: #333333; background-color: #f5f5f5; height: 353px;" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="360">
<tbody>
<tr style="background-color:#e5e5e5" valign="middle">
<td style="padding:2px 1px 0px 5px;"><a style="color:#333; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/" target="_blank">Indecision</a></td>
<td style="padding:2px 5px 0px 5px; text-align:right; font-weight:bold;">An Indecision Exclusive!</td>
</tr>
<tr style="height: 14px;" valign="middle">
<td style="padding:2px 1px 0px 5px;" colspan="2"><a style="color:#333; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=220242" target="_blank">Sandra Day O&#8217;Connor Pt. 1</a></td>
</tr>
<tr style="height: 14px; background-color: #353535;" valign="middle">
<td style="padding: 2px 5px 0px; overflow: hidden; width: 360px; text-align: right;" colspan="2"><a style="color:#96deff; text-decoration:none; font-weight:bold;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/" target="_blank">indecisionforever.com</a></td>
</tr>
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<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/videos.jhtml" target="_blank">Funny Political Video</a></td>
<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://www.indecisionforever.com/games.jhtml" target="_blank">Political Games</a></td>
<td style="padding: 3px; width: 33%;"><a style="font:10px arial; color:#333; text-decoration:none;" href="http://blog.indecision2008.com/tag/joe-biden/" target="_blank">Joe Biden Jokes</a></td>
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<p>In terms of this post, the key part of what Stewart says takes up from a line that Sandra Day O&#8217;Connor had mentioned earlier in the interview. Jon Stewart says</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>As a secular, godless humanist, I think, myself [...] I&#8217;m an activist host [...]</strong></p>
<p>I think the second part is meant as a joke, but the first part doesn&#8217;t seem like it to me.</p>
<p>On the blog <a title="Unreasonable Faith" href="http://unreasonablefaith.com/2009/07/01/jon-stewart-on-religion-morality/" title="Unreasonable Faith">Unreasonable Faith</a> was a post about a <a title="Jon Stewart — The Truth Smirks" href="http://www.sojo.net/index.cfm?action=magazine.article&amp;issue=soj0907&amp;article=the-truth-smirks" title="Jon Stewart — The Truth Smirks">just-published interview</a> with Jon Stewart in the religious magazine <a title="Sojourners " href="http://www.sojo.net/index.cfm?" title="Sojourners ">Sojourners</a> (free registration required to view article) in which Stewart talks about his views on religion. A few quotes:</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>It may be true that the Hebrew prophets used humor [...] to create social change, but it was also used by <a title="Wikiepdia — Borscht Belt" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borscht_Belt" title="Wikiepdia — Borscht Belt">Borscht Belt</a> social directors. We’ve got a lot more in common with them than the prophets. [...] Because we’re in the public eye, maybe people project onto us their desires for that type of activism coming from us, but just knowing the process here as I do, our show is maybe the antithesis of activism, and that is a relatively selfish pursuit.  [...] People have always said to us, “You want it both ways; you want to be taken seriously but then not.” And I always say, “When do we want to be taken seriously? We’re just doing our show.”</strong></p>
<p>So I think that answers part of my question: at least as Stewart is concerned, he&#8217;s not trying to get on a soapbox (although in some episodes, it seems he might on politics at least) but just saying what they think about current events, in a (hopefully) funny and interesting way obviously.</p>
<p>About religion specifically, Stewart said:</p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><strong>I have trouble with dogma more than I have trouble with religion. I think the best thing religion does is give people a sense of place, purpose, and compassion. My quibble with it is when it’s described as the only way to have those things instilled. You can be moral and not be religious, you can be compassionate, you can be empathetic—you can have all those wonderful qualities. When it begins to be judged as purely based on religion, then you’re suggesting a world where Star Jones goes to heaven but Gandhi doesn’t. [...] When people say things like, “I found God and that helped me stop drinking,” I say, “Great! More power to you. Just know that some people stop drinking without it.”</strong></p>
<p>So to me, it sounds like Stewart is personally agnostic or an atheist, but it&#8217;s not something that he wants to get on a soapbox about. If religion works for you, fine, but it&#8217;s not the only choice out there. To a large extent, I agree with this sentiment. But, at the same time, there are a lot of people who believe their Holy Book (Bible, Quran, or whatever) is 100% God&#8217;s truth and must be followed.</p>
<p>Most people who&#8217;d be likely to view The Daily Show probably already aren&#8217;t die-hard fundamenalists/orthodox followers of their religion, but maybe it does have an effect on the people who are less religious and don&#8217;t normally think about such things. But whether they&#8217;re trying to do so or not, Stewart&#8217;s show does a good job I think at showing people that religion has some crazy, and sometimes harmful, ideas in it.  It&#8217;s something you don&#8217;t come across very often in the mainstream media, and it&#8217;s definitely refreshing.</p>
<p>Colbert is a more complex situation, and this post is already plenty long. I&#8217;ll revisit him sometime soon (spoiler alert: &quot;word&quot; has it he&#8217;s a Sunday School teacher!).</p>
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		<title>Revelation, according to The Brick Testament</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/06/30/revelation-according-to-the-brick-testament/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/06/30/revelation-according-to-the-brick-testament/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 01:15:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[The Brick Testament's take on Revelation]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The Brick Testament has recently posted the end of their coverage of the <a href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/revelation/">Book of Revelation</a> . If you&#8217;re not familiar with the Brick Testament, you should definitely check it out. It tells the stories from the Bible using Legos (I kid you not). Here&#8217;s a picture of all of the non-believers burning in hell forever.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/revelation/gods_garish_eternal_tribute_to_himself/rv22_15p21_08.html"><img src="http://www.thebricktestament.com/revelation/gods_garish_eternal_tribute_to_himself/rv22_15p21_08.jpg" alt="" width="533" height="399" /> </a> <a href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/revelation/gods_garish_eternal_tribute_to_himself/rv22_15p21_08.html"> </a></p>
<p><a href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/revelation/gods_garish_eternal_tribute_to_himself/rv22_15p21_08.html">Source</a></p>
<p>What&#8217;s funny and/or sad is that they take the passages just as they are from the Bible, word-for-word. Occasionally, in a thought bubble, they will put something that isn&#8217;t in the text, but the text itself is directly underneath the images. With Revelation, I think the Brick Testament does an excellent job of showing all of these (perhaps literally) insane images that the author thought of and exposing them for the horrid, hate-filled foolishness they are.</p>
<p>I think if more people read The Brick Testament, they would realize how ridiculous, violent, and ungodly the Bible really is. I highly recommend it, and am going to add it to my humor and Bible links on my website.</p>
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		<title>God minus God</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/06/16/god-minus-god/</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Jun 2009 06:47:13 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[Tuesday, June 16, 2009 Currently Garfield Minus Garfield By Jim Davis see related God minus God Since I can&#8217;t sleep, I thought I&#8217;d share this hopefully funny thought. Have you ever heard of Garfield minus Garfield ? It&#8217;s basically like it sounds: the daily Garfield comic strip, stripped of its famous striped cat. To quote [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Tuesday, June 16, 2009</div>
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<td width="99%" valign="top">Currently<br />
<a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=0345513878&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank">Garfield Minus Garfield</a><br />
By Jim Davis<br />
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<h4 class="itemtitle">God minus God</h4>
<p>Since I can&#8217;t sleep, I thought I&#8217;d share this hopefully funny thought.</p>
<p>Have you ever heard of <a href="http://garfieldminusgarfield.net/">Garfield minus Garfield</a> ? It&#8217;s basically like it sounds: the daily Garfield comic strip, stripped of its famous striped cat. To quote its inventor/author, Dan Walsh, the strip shows</p>
<p>&quot;the existential angst of a certain young Mr. Jon Arbuckle. It is a journey deep into the mind of an isolated young everyman as he fights a losing battle against loneliness and depression in a quiet American suburb.&quot;</p>
<p>I think it&#8217;s absolutely hilarious. I don&#8217;t read it every day, but every couple months I think of it and go and catch up on some ones I&#8217;ve missed. I find it a lot more entertaining than the original strip, and even Jim Davis (Garfield&#8217;s cartoonist) apparently <a href="http://garfieldminusgarfield.net/private/61669516/fSymsOGXOgrmmihjqTZaCBY2">likes it</a> .</p>
<p>Well, I just had a thought, which unless it&#8217;s already been done, I hereby copyright (just as I&#8217;ve copyrighted &quot;the-patriarch-intermittently-known-as-Israel&quot; ©). What about a version of the Bible with God taken out of it? I think this would be a fabulous idea since, as you may know, it would reflect reality. It could either be called &quot;God minus God&quot;, or &quot;The Bible minus God&quot;, can&#8217;t decide which is better.</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s an example (proof of concept, if you will) of what this would be like, taking <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Exodus%203;&amp;version=49">Exodus 3</a> . You can (re)read it first to get an idea of what the scene is like if you want, it&#8217;s the Moses and the burning bush story. (All quotes are paraphrases put in quotes for comic effect.)</p>
<p>Moses sees a bush burning and suddenly shouts out &quot;Hey, here I am!&quot; No response.</p>
<p>Then Moses suddenly ducks and hides his eyes for no apparently reason. Prolonged silence.</p>
<p>Then, he suddenly says &quot;Who am I to go tell Pharaoh that I have to free the Israelites?!&quot; Silence.</p>
<p>Then out of the blue, Moses says &quot;I&#8217;ll tell the Israelites the God of their fathers sent me! But what should I tell him is his name?&quot; No reply.</p>
<p>Moses then says &quot;Yeah, I&#8217;ll tell them &quot;I am&quot; has sent me!!&quot; Moses just stands there in silence.</p>
<p>The end.</p>
<p>Okay, maybe it&#8217;s only funny to me. Kind of like a <a href="http://www.thebricktestament.com/">Brick Testament</a> rendering of the Bible, except without the God. If nothing else, the absence of God would make it closer to reality!!</p>
<p>One final note, and I don&#8217;t remember if I&#8217;ve mentioned this before — part of the reason I chose &quot;I Am&quot; for the title of the blog, in addition to the story I tell in my first post about my eventual coming out as an atheist, was because God refers to himself as &quot;I Am&quot;, which even when I was a believer sounded weird to me. So instead of &quot;I Am the LORD&quot; or &quot;I Am I Am&quot; (or Popeye&#8217;s &quot;I am what I am, and that&#8217;s all that I am&quot;), we have &quot;I Am the BLOG&quot; (or Blog, take your pick).</p>
<p>Okay, time to try to get to sleep!</td>
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		<title>The Triune Cereal</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/02/21/the-triune-cereal/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 21 Feb 2009 20:50:34 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[Saturday, February 21, 2009 Currently Synchronicity By The Police Synchronicity 2 (&#34;We have to shout above the din of our Rice Krispies&#34;) see related The Triune Cereal It occurred to me that instead of using pretzels or three-leafed clovers, people could use Rice Krispies to explain the Christian Trinity. As the Christian Trinity is made [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Saturday, February 21, 2009</div>
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<!--    TrackBegin-->Synchronicity 2 (&quot;We have to shout above the din of our Rice Krispies&quot;)<!--    TrackEnd--><br />
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<p><!--    format:2--><br />
</span> <strong>The Triune Cereal</strong><br />
It occurred to me that instead of using pretzels or three-leafed clovers, people could use Rice Krispies to explain the Christian Trinity.</p>
<p><a href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/?nextdate=2%2f14%2f2009+14%3a14%3a0.457&amp;direction=p" target="_blank"><img style="border-style: none; border-width: 0px; width: 249px; height: 141px;" src="http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/0gkdfIVa5wdgO/610x.jpg" alt="" /> </a></p>
<p>As the Christian Trinity is made up of three godheads, Rice Krispies is made up of three people (perhaps cerealheads?): Snap, Crackle, and Pop. There are three of them, but it&#8217;s still only one cereal, and you need Snap, Crackle, and Pop to have Rice Krispies. Pop would obviously be the father, given his name. Snap looks the most like Pop, kind of like how a young, unbearded Jesus would have resembled his dad, so there&#8217;s our second. And then Crackle would be the Holy Spirit, not because he does anything special, but because someone needs to fill the third slot (pretty much like the Holy Spirit does). Snap, Crackle, and Pop are a team, you can&#8217;t have one without the other or else you wouldn&#8217;t have Rice Krispies, just as the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit together make up God.</p>
<p>Not only that, but the best part of this analogy is that you eat Rice Krispies, just as Christians eat God. The milk and rice that nourish your body when you eat Rice Krispies are just like the body and blood that nourish your soul when you eat Holy Communion.</p>
<p>Too bad I&#8217;m not a Christian any more, I could make money off this thing. Maybe I should do an L Ron Hubbard and decide to found my own Krispie-ology religion, <a href="http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/L._Ron_Hubbard">that&#8217;s where the money is.</a></td>
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		<title>Roy Zimmerman</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/01/16/roy-zimmerman/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Jan 2009 05:49:15 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[Friday, January 16, 2009 Currently Faulty Intelligence By Roy Zimmerman see related Roy Zimmerman I have to take a few days off from my blog, but here&#8217;s an artist I recently discovered thanks to an American Freethought interview. If you haven&#8217;t heard of Roy Zimmerman, I highly recommend you hear of him! He writes &#34;funny [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Friday, January 16, 2009</div>
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<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B000J2EW9E/ref=nosim/xangacom"><img src="http://g-ecx.images-amazon.com/images/G/01/ciu/89/f4/9aa31363ada0e9f5a9afd010.L._AA240_.jpg" alt="" width="78" height="78" /> </a></p>
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<td width="99%" valign="top">Currently<br />
<a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B000J2EW9E&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank">Faulty Intelligence</a><br />
By Roy Zimmerman<br />
<!--  TrackBegin--><!--  TrackEnd--><a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B000J2EW9E&amp;user=14950702&amp;related=1" target="_blank">see related</a></td>
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<h4 class="itemtitle">Roy Zimmerman</h4>
<p>I have to take a few days off from my blog, but here&#8217;s an artist I recently discovered thanks to an <a href="http://www.americanfreethought.com/wordpress/index.php">American Freethought</a> interview. If you haven&#8217;t heard of Roy Zimmerman, I highly recommend you hear of him! He writes &quot;funny songs about ignorance, war, and greed&quot;, as his website says. He also includes a lot of religion in there, too.</p>
<p>You can check him out on <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/royzimmerman?blend=1">YouTube</a> , or here&#8217;s his <a href="http://www.royzimmerman.com/">website</a> . I used some of my holiday money (well, the person who gave it to me thought it was Christmas money) to buy a couple of his albums. My favorites so far are Creation Science 101, Christmas is Pain, Christma-Hanu-Rama-Ka-Dona-Kwanzaa, and Buy War Toys for Christmas. No, all of his songs aren&#8217;t about Christmas. I bought one of his Christmas albums, so there&#8217;s a sampling bias. <img src="http://www.xanga.com/Images/smiley1.gif" alt="" width="15" height="15" /> But anyway, hope you like it and I&#8217;ll post back in a few days.</td>
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<div class="smalltext"><a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/689526324/roy-zimmerman/" class="snap_nopreview">12:49 AM</a> <span class="itemviews"> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/689526324/roy-zimmerman/" class="snap_nopreview">1 view</a> </span> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/689526324/roy-zimmerman/" class="snap_nopreview">add eprops</a> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/689526324/roy-zimmerman/" class="snap_nopreview">add comments</a> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/send.aspx?uid=689526324&amp;tab=weblogs&amp;user=iamtheblog" class="snap_nopreview">email it</a></div>
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		<title>Just imagine&#8230; (a world without God)</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/01/05/just-imagine-2/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2009/01/05/just-imagine-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Jan 2009 15:12:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Bible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Commentary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bloodthirsty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[Monday, January 05, 2009 Currently Sounds Of Summer &#8211; The Very Best Of The Beach Boys By The Beach Boys Kokomo see related Just imagine&#8230; Imagine for a second that an insane bloodthirsty maniac decides he is going to kill the entire population of the Earth. He&#8217;s a whiz at computers and breaks into the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Monday, January 05, 2009</div>
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<td width="1%" valign="top"><a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B000093BDX&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank"><img src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/4132V44YATL._SL75_.jpg" border="0" alt="" /> </a></td>
<td width="99%" valign="top">Currently<br />
<a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B000093BDX&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank">Sounds Of Summer &#8211; The Very Best Of The Beach Boys</a><br />
By The Beach Boys<br />
<!--    TrackBegin-->Kokomo<!--    TrackEnd--><br />
<a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B000093BDX&amp;user=14950702&amp;related=1" target="_blank">see related</a></td>
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<h4 class="itemtitle">Just imagine&#8230;</h4>
<p>Imagine for a second that an insane bloodthirsty maniac decides he is going to kill the entire population of the Earth. He&#8217;s a whiz at computers and breaks into the US Defense Department&#8217;s computers and gains access to the United States&#8217; vast nuclear arsenal (hey, if Matthew Broderick can do it in <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WarGames">WarGames</a> , so can he).</p>
<p>To be thorough (and dramatic), our madman decides to start at the bottom of the list of countries in the world and work his way up one-by-one. (He uses <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_population">Wikipedia&#8217;s list of countries and self-governing territories</a> as a source because like many computer-savvy people, he&#8217;s a huge fan of Wikipedia.) He is able to launch nuclear weapons against the 41 least populous places in the world before he is found and his killing spree is stopped. The entire populations of these countries and territories either die immediately or in short order due to the nuclear blasts he launched.</p>
<p>Now, who do you think will have killed more people: this crazy mass-murderer, or the God of the Bible? If you said the insane madman, you&#8217;d be wrong. According to Wikipedia (as of Jan 5 2009), the 41 least populous countries or self-governed states have a combined population of 2,211,501 people. That&#8217;s a lot of people. But according to the Bible, God killed at least<span style="font-weight: bold;"> 2,301,417 people</span> . Steve Wells, the author of the <a href="http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/">Skeptics Annotated Bible</a> , did the <a href="http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/2009/01/how-many-has-god-killed-revised_04.html">calculations</a> in his blog <a href="http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/">Dwindling in Unbelief</a> , but the numbers come directly from the Bible itself. The figure includes people that God killed personally, plus ones he commanded or sanctioned the death of in the Bible. It only includes incidents for which death totals are given in the Bible. So God outdoes our fictional mass-murderer by almost 100,000 people!</p>
<p>But wait, you protest. The nuclear fallout from our imaginary madman would certainly kill millions more, so he still is the top killer. Well, it turns out that God has also killed millions more. The 2,301,417 people Steve Wells includes in his total of God killings are just the ones for which figures are given in the Bible. If we include estimates for all the times God kills or sanctions a killing when the Bible doesn&#8217;t even bother to tally the dead, Steve arrives at a much larger <a href="http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/2009/01/how-many-has-god-killed-revised_04.html">figure</a> : <span style="font-weight: bold;">33,280,237</span> . Our fictional madman would have to kill the inhabitants of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_population">Wikipedia</a> &#8216;s 80 least populous places in the world to match this total (either by nuclear bomb, or some other ingenious scheme).</p>
<p>You may argue with some of the estimates Steve gives (who besides God would know how many people actually died in the Flood, for example), but since the Bible doesn&#8217;t think it&#8217;s important enough to mention how many people died in these massacres, Steve had to come up with his own estimates. He gives his reasons behind the numbers if you follow the links. Some are more exact estimates than others. But even if he&#8217;s a few million off, that&#8217;s still an amazing amount of killing for an entity many Christians believe is a loving God who is the source of all morality.</p>
<p>To get an idea of just how many people the Bible says God killed, according to the <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">conservative</span> total (2.3 million),<span style="font-weight: bold;"> the following 41 countries or self-governing territories could all have their inhabitants wiped off the face of the Earth and still not equal the killings God is credited with in the Bible</span> : São Tomé and Príncipe, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, U.S. Virgin Islands, Federated States of Micronesia, Grenada, Aruba, Tonga, Kiribati, Jersey, Seychelles, Antigua and Barbuda, Northern Mariana Islands, Andorra, Isle of Man, Dominica, American Samoa, Guernsey, Bermuda, Marshall Islands, Greenland, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Faroe Islands, Cayman Islands, Liechtenstein, Monaco, San Marino, Gibraltar, Turks and Caicos Islands, British Virgin Islands, Cook Islands, Palau, Anguilla, Tuvalu, Nauru, Saint Helena, Montserrat, Falkland Islands, Niue, Tokelau, Vatican City, Pitcairn Islands.</p>
<p>If we take Steve Well&#8217;s<span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;"> estimated total </span> of over 33 million, <span style="font-weight: bold;">here&#8217;s the list of places that could all have their <span style="font-style: italic;">entire</span> populations slaughtered without reaching God&#8217;s glorious total</span> : Slovenia, Lesotho, Botswana, Gambia, Guinea-Bissau, Estonia, Trinidad and Tobago, Gabon, Mauritius, East Timor, Swaziland, Qatar, Djibouti, Fiji, Cyprus, Bahrain, Guyana, Comoros, Bhutan, Montenegro, Cape Verde, Equatorial Guinea, Solomon Islands, Luxembourg, Western Sahara, Suriname, Malta, Brunei, Bahamas, Iceland, Maldives, Barbados, Belize, Vanuatu, Netherlands Antilles, Samoa, Guam, Saint Lucia, São Tomé and Príncipe, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, U.S. Virgin Islands, Federated States of Micronesia, Grenada, Aruba, Tonga, Kiribati, Jersey, Seychelles, Antigua and Barbuda, Northern Mariana Islands, Andorra, Isle of Man, Dominica, American Samoa, Guernsey, Bermuda, Marshall Islands, Greenland, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Faroe Islands, Cayman Islands, Liechtenstein, Monaco, San Marino, Gibraltar, Turks and Caicos Islands, British Virgin Islands, Cook Islands, Palau, Anguilla, Tuvalu, Nauru, Saint Helena, Montserrat, Falkland Islands, Niue, Tokelau, Vatican City, Pitcairn Islands</p>
<p>Sure, if you&#8217;re like me and most people, you probably don&#8217;t recognize or know a lot about some of these places, but certainly you recognize a good number of them. But in case a list of random countries don&#8217;t hit home, maybe a few other examples might help:</p>
<p>• The entire region/continent of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oceania">Oceania</a> has around 30 million people, according to Wikipedia. If our crazy murderer could just make Australia, New Zealand, and the population of most of the Pacific Islands die overnight, that would still be less than how many lives God took in the Bible.</p>
<p>• The top 20 cities in the US could have their entire population croak on the spot (32.4 million people in all), and God&#8217;s total would still be almost 1 million more.</p>
<p>• According to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_population">Wikipedia</a> , 185 countries/territories out of the 221 (about 4 out of 5) in the world have a population of less than 33 million people. If our madman could randomly take any one of these countries and just kill all of its inhabitants with a snap, he would likely have killed less people than the biblical God killed.</p>
<p>• With those odds, he could even just pick to destroy any one country in the world at random and he&#8217;d have about a 4 out of 5 chance of killing less people than God did in the Bible.</p>
<p>• The Bible was written (primarily) in Hebrew and Greek. God has killed more than the current populations of Israel and Greece combined (plus you can easily throw a country like Cuba or Belgium in for good measure).</p>
<p>• The Beach Boys (or what&#8217;s left of them) could go butcher all the inhabitants of the places they mention in the song <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kokomo_%28song%29">Kokomo</a> , and it would only add up to around 4.7 million people. They could also go ahead and easily bump off any tourists who might be there at the time, too, and still fall far shy of God&#8217;s 33+ million estimated deaths.</p>
<p>I could go on and on, but you get the idea. The Bible depicts a God with the blood of millions of people on his hands. Is this a good model for us or our children?</p>
<p>Fortunately, I have good news. Besides being mass-murders, <span style="font-weight: bold;">our insane bloodthirsty maniac and our insane bloodthirsty God have one other thing in common: they&#8217;re both fictional.</span> Unfortunately, at least some of the people in the Bible probably did die because people thought God wanted them to do it. Not to mention the Crusades, the Inquisition, witch-burning, and countless other cases where people have killed in the name of God. Or other deaths some people have recently attributed to God (Katrina, etc.). Or all the future deaths certainly still to committed in God&#8217;s name.</p>
<p>Couldn&#8217;t an all-powerful, all-knowing God and his followers think of a better way to get things done than death? Instead of thinking of all this senseless killing, wouldn&#8217;t it be nice to<span style="font-weight: bold;"> imagine a world without God? Just imagine&#8230;</span></td>
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<div class="smalltext"><span class="snap_nopreview">10:12 AM</span> <span class="itemviews"> &#8211; <span class="snap_nopreview">422 views</span> </span> -</div>
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		<title>Baby Lord</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2008/12/13/baby-lord/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2008/12/13/baby-lord/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 13 Dec 2008 20:19:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=213</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I've written a festival holiday version of the Supremes song "Baby Love" called "Baby Lord". Basically, it's Mother Mary talking to Baby Jesus about the real reason behind Christmas.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Saturday, December 13, 2008</div>
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<td width="1%" valign="top"><a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B0010OM7GA&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank"><img src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/510mm4Mp2%2BL._SL75_.jpg" border="0" alt="" /> </a></td>
<td width="99%" valign="top">Currently<br />
<a href="http://www.xanga.com/Amazon/Click.aspx?asin=B0010OM7GA&amp;user=14950702" target="_blank">Diana Ross &amp; The supremes</a><br />
<!--     TrackBegin-->Baby Love<!--     TrackEnd--><br />
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<h4 class="itemtitle">Baby Lord</h4>
<p>I&#8217;ve written a festival holiday version of the Supremes song &quot;Baby Love&quot; called &quot;Baby Lord&quot;. Here are the lyrics. Basically, it&#8217;s Mother Mary talking to Baby Jesus about the real reason behind Christmas.</p>
<p>Note: If you&#8217;d like to share this song, you can either <a href="http://www.xanga.com/iamtheblog/685693349/baby-lord.html">link to this post</a> (http://www.xanga.com/iamtheblog/685693349/baby-lord.html), or else you <span style="text-decoration: underline;">must</span> include the copyright notices listed on top so that the original writers (and I) get credit. Hope you enjoy!</p>
<p>Edit: I&#8217;ve done a quick karaoke-style recording of the song. I&#8217;m not a professional singer, but this will give you an idea of what it would sound like. The complete lyrics (including back-up vocals) can be found below.</p>
<div style="background-image: url(http://s.xanga.com/images/audioplaceholder.gif); background-repeat: no-repeat; width: 400px; height: 80px;"><object width="100" height="100" height="100" width="100" data="http://audio.xanga.com/mp3embedplayer.swf?i=3038841&amp;m=c94c0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"><param name="src" value="http://audio.xanga.com/mp3embedplayer.swf?i=3038841&amp;m=c94c0" /></object></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://photo.xanga.com/iamtheblog/e42c0224817797/photo.html" target="_blank"><img style="border-style: none; border-width: 0px;" title="Baby Lord" src="http://xe4.xanga.com/2c0f540306537224817797/w176678585.png" alt="" title="Baby Lord" height="799" /> </a></div>
<p>PS Here&#8217;s a link to some <a href="http://docs.google.com/fileview?id=F.d1a0aa33-4353-42e1-b728-67adfb1fd269&amp;hl=en">comments</a> about the song.</td>
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<div class="smalltext"><a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/685693349/baby-lord/" class="snap_nopreview">3:19 PM</a> <span class="itemviews"> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/685693349/baby-lord/" class="snap_nopreview">66 views</a> </span> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/685693349/baby-lord/" class="snap_nopreview">add eprops</a> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/685693349/baby-lord/" class="snap_nopreview">2 comments</a> &#8211; <a class="snap_nopreview" href="http://iamtheblog.xanga.com/send.aspx?uid=685693349&amp;tab=weblogs&amp;user=iamtheblog" class="snap_nopreview">email it</a></div>
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		<title>Genesis 7-8 — What a cute children&#8217;s story!</title>
		<link>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2008/10/04/genesis-7-8-%e2%80%94-what-a-cute-childrens-story/</link>
		<comments>http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/2008/10/04/genesis-7-8-%e2%80%94-what-a-cute-childrens-story/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 04 Oct 2008 17:48:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://IAMTHEBLOG.COM/wordpress2/?p=196</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Saturday, October 04, 2008 Genesis 7-8 — What a cute children&#8217;s story! I&#8217;m continuing with Genesis 7-8 right away since it continues the flood story. Noah and the Ark is considered a fun kids&#8217; story. I used to think so, too, when I was a kid. God saving all the animals! One of my favorite [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="blogheader">Saturday, October 04, 2008</div>
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<h4 class="itemtitle">Genesis 7-8 — What a cute children&#8217;s story!</h4>
<p>I&#8217;m continuing with Genesis 7-8 right away since it continues the flood story. Noah and the Ark is considered a fun kids&#8217; story. I used to think so, too, when I was a kid. God saving all the animals! One of my favorite songs was (and is, for different reasons now) &quot;Rise and Shine&quot;. But how does the sanitized song compare to the &quot;real&quot; thing? Let&#8217;s see!</p>
<p>(PS I can&#8217;t find authorship for this song, and there appear to be a number of variations out there; if I find the original or the authors, I will list them here. Here&#8217;s a similar version on <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6PA_vYAk4Q">YouTube.</a> )</p>
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<p><br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">CHORUS:</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Rise and shine, and give God the glory, glory</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Rise and shine, and give God the glory, glory</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Rise and shine, and give God the glory, glory, children of the Lord.</span></p>
<p>Yes kids, you are God&#8217;s special children! &#8230; What did you say, Timmy? Are children of the Lord the same as sons of God in Genesis 6? Where did that question come from? Well, I guess so, we&#8217;re all sons and daughters of God because he loves us! Okay, let&#8217;s continue with the song now!<br />
<br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">1. The Lord said to Noah, “There’s gonna be a floody, floody.”</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Lord said to Noah, “There’s gonna be a floody, floody.”</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">“Get those animals out of the muddy, muddy, children of the Lord.”</span></p>
<p>Wasn&#8217;t it nice, children, for God to warn Noah about the flood? Otherwise Noah and the animals would have gotten all wet! &#8230;What&#8217;s that, Timmy? Why was there a flood? Couldn&#8217;t God have stopped the flood and eliminated the need to build an ark and save the animals? Umm&#8230;be quiet and sing!</p>
<p><span style="font-style: italic;">2. So Noah, he built him, he built him an arky arky</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Noah, he built him, he built him an arky arky</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Made it out of gopher barky, barky, children of the Lord</span></p>
<p>Noah was a great builder! Do any of you like big boats, too? &#8230; What&#8217;s up now, Timmy? &#8230; No, I don&#8217;t know what gopher bark was, the Bible doesn&#8217;t say. It must have been some magical material because it was strong enough to hold all the animals, and Noah and his family! &#8230; No, it&#8217;s not impossible to build a vessel like the one described in the Bible, and even if it was God can help people do things that seem impossible! Okay? Now, let&#8217;s go on!<br />
<br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">3. The animals, they came on, they came on by twosies, twosies,</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Animals, they came on, they came on by twosies, twosies,</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Elephants and kangaroosies, roosies, children of the Lord</span></p>
<p>Wouldn&#8217;t that be fun to go on a big boat with all those animals? It would be tons of fun, just like a big old zoo! &#8230; Now what, Timmy? &#8230; Yes, it does say in Genesis 7 that Noah took seven of clean animals and birds. That&#8217;s a pretty smart question for a 5-year-old! &#8230;What does &quot;clean&quot; mean? Well it means that they weren&#8217;t dirty, I guess. Just like you&#8217;re supposed to be nice and squeaky clean before you go to church! &#8230;No, God wouldn&#8217;t have drowned you if you forgot to clean behind your ears, don&#8217;t be silly! Moving on&#8230;</p>
<p><span style="font-style: italic;">4. It rained and poured for forty daysies, daysies</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Rained and poured for forty daysies, daysies</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Nearly drove those animals crazies, crazies, children of the Lord.</span></p>
<p>Forty days is a long time to be in a boat, isn&#8217;t it kids? But I bet it was still fun! &#8230; What do you want now, Timmy? &#8230; Well, yes I guess you could say the verses about the flood give different numbers that seem contradictory, who told you that? And where on Earth did a 5-year-old like you learn the word &quot;contradictory&quot;? You&#8217;re driving me crazies-crazies with all these questions! &#8230; Well, yes all the other animals that weren&#8217;t on the ark did die in the flood &#8230; Well, no the animals didn&#8217;t do anything wrong. &#8230; Yes,  all the people died, too, except Noah and his family, because God saved them! &#8230; Why&#8217;d he kill the rest of humanity? Because they were bad and God wanted to teach them a lesson, but Noah was a good man. &#8230; What do you mean he was a drunk who liked to lay around naked? Where do you get such crazy ideas?!?! &#8230;Stop crying, Sally, Timmy doesn&#8217;t mean it! Now just be quiet kids and listen!</p>
<p><span style="font-style: italic;">5. The sun came out and dried up the landy, landy</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Sun came out and dried up the landy, landy</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Everything was fine and dandy, dandy, children of the Lord.</span></p>
<p>After the flood, God sent us a beautiful, sunny day to show us everything was okay!! You again, Timmy? &#8230; I guess there would be dead carcasses everywhere after the flood dried up. &#8230; Yes, and dead people everywhere. &#8230; Yes, I&#8217;m sure it smelled really bad. &#8230; Well, <span style="text-decoration: underline;">besides</span> that, it was fine and dandy, and it was nice and sunny again! Stop interrupting!!! And Sally, quit pinching your nose!</p>
<p><span style="font-style: italic;">6. The animals, they came out, they came out by threesies, threesies.</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Animals, they came out, they came out by threesies, threesies.</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Dogs and cats and chimpanzeesies, zeesies, children of the Lord.</span></p>
<p>You see kids, then all the animals could come out and play again! &#8230; Yes, Timmy? &#8230; They came out by threesies because all the mommy and daddy animals had a baby! &#8230; Um, you can ask your mom how that happens. &#8230; Is that why God had Noah put seven storks on the ark? I guess that would make sense, thank you Timmy! &#8230; You were being sarcastic? How do you even know the word &quot;sarcastic&quot;? We&#8217;re almost done, so just be quiet!!!!<br />
<br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">7. Now this is the end of, the end of our story, story.</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">This is the end of, the end of our story, story.</span> <br style="font-style: italic;" /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Everything is hunky dory, dory, children of the Lord.</span></p>
<p>That&#8217;s the end of &#8230; What it is NOW, Timmy?!?! &#8230; Yes, it was honky dory, why do you ask? &#8230; Well, the Bible says God did feel bad about the flood, yes&#8230; No, that doesn&#8217;t mean he made a mistake! God is perfect! &#8230; Yes, God did promise never to flood the planet again. See how nice God is! &#8230; Well Katrina was different. &#8230; No they didn&#8217;t deserve it because they were all gay, where did you hear that? &#8230; Your mom said that? Well, you&#8217;ll have to take that up with her, then.</p>
<p>Well, that&#8217;s it, kiddies! Time to go out and live like God&#8217;s little children! &#8230; This is the last time, Timmy, now what do you want to ask? &#8230; Well, yes, people still sin. &#8230; So what did it solve to kill all those people and animals, then?!?</p>
<p>I give up!!! I&#8217;ve had it!!! Either you go Timmy, or I go! God, where&#8217;s a flood when you need one? Calgon, take me away!!!</td>
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